I’m guessing that for some folks blogging, if not done with the proper motives, very quickly degenerates into a futile exercise. There is no doubt in my mind that for me blogging means a lot. I learn so much from the postings of others, regardless of whether or not the material is original or not. Probably the most exciting thing for me when it comes to blogging is the online community. I have the opportunity to converse, hang out with, talk, dream, learn, observe, meet, etc…from a bunch of people that under other circumstances I would not.
Today it really began to hit me. I became blog bloated. There are so many insightful and fascinating blogs with information that is both practical and entertaining. And well, honestly, I have always wanted to fit in with the cool kids. With the blogging community online, I have come about as close as I have ever been. (Man, this is turning into a sad commentary about my life.) But today I felt lost and hopeless.
The real issue here is that I have deep within me this burning desire to be recognized for who I am and what I do. I know that John Eldridge (whom I have actually met) would say that is part of being a man. But sometimes I feel so overwhelmed and conflicted about it. On one hand it has driven me to take risks and to see the possibilities in my life. On the other hand it comes with an ego, and not just a small ego. A big fat voice that screams at the top of its lungs….HEY! LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT WHAT I DID! AREN’T I COOL?
Look I’m not beating myself up. I know that I have gifts and abilities and I want to use them to really make a difference in this world by the grace of God. But my ego. So deeply flawed and broken. So consistently focused on me.
So let me ask you: Where are you headed in life? and Why?