Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Blahginess!

Blog Bloated

I’m guessing that for some folks blogging, if not done with the proper motives, very quickly degenerates into a futile exercise. There is no doubt in my mind that for me blogging means a lot. I learn so much from the postings of others, regardless of whether or not the material is original or not. Probably the most exciting thing for me when it comes to blogging is the online community. I have the opportunity to converse, hang out with, talk, dream, learn, observe, meet, etc…from a bunch of people that under other circumstances I would not.

Today it really began to hit me. I became blog bloated. There are so many insightful and fascinating blogs with information that is both practical and entertaining. And well, honestly, I have always wanted to fit in with the cool kids. With the blogging community online, I have come about as close as I have ever been. (Man, this is turning into a sad commentary about my life.) But today I felt lost and hopeless.

The real issue here is that I have deep within me this burning desire to be recognized for who I am and what I do. I know that John Eldridge (whom I have actually met) would say that is part of being a man. But sometimes I feel so overwhelmed and conflicted about it. On one hand it has driven me to take risks and to see the possibilities in my life. On the other hand it comes with an ego, and not just a small ego. A big fat voice that screams at the top of its lungs….HEY! LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT WHAT I DID! AREN’T I COOL?

Look I’m not beating myself up. I know that I have gifts and abilities and I want to use them to really make a difference in this world by the grace of God. But my ego. So deeply flawed and broken. So consistently focused on me.

So let me ask you: Where are you headed in life? and Why?


4 responses

  1. I have no idea where I am headed. I used to try and figure it all out but now I just try and follow Jesus, one day at a time.

    This blogging thing is really fun and really draining. I am glad I am using blogger, because once I took my counter off, I have no idea who is reading my blog unless they leave a comment. I write it for the people who know me in real life but when I meet someone like you, I really like it too.

    I don’t think the ego thing is about being a man. I think the women want to fit in and feel significant just as much. Trust me on that one. 😉

    June 26, 2008 at 9:39 pm

  2. kim

    Hi there.

    There IS a ‘cool kid’ factor in blogging, isn’t there? Weird how that happens. I went to a conference in February where it seemed like all of the 100 people there were ‘cool kids’ either in real life, in the blog world, or (for the lucky few) BOTH!!!! 🙂 So, so out of place was I.

    Your question: where are you headed in life and why?

    I honestly don’t know. I have never been a person guided by specific long term goals, which goes against every bit of teaching I’ve ever heard. But that’s just the way it’s been. And I’m grateful for that. Because I would have never had the imagination to set the kinds of goals that would have aimed me toward some of the interesting places I’ve landed.

    I think the most honest answer I can give… despite it’s corniness… is just to say that I want to be obedient to God’s guidance, whatever direction that takes me.

    June 27, 2008 at 2:20 pm

  3. kenyongerbrandt

    tawny–thanks for the encouragement. I especially appreciate the advice about not knowing who or how many views your blog gets…that’s pretty good advice. And yes I can be kind of chauvinist in my thinking…apologies!

    kim–finally you comment on my blog…I have made it! Yes I agree that your statement is maybe not corny, but simplistic…but that is the faith that we are called to…like a little child! Thanks for that reminder.

    June 27, 2008 at 4:06 pm

  4. kim

    surely there must be better measures of ‘making it’? 🙂
    I’ve been reading your blog for a while now… didn’t realized I had never commented. That’s really terrible of me. I’m always surprised when someone I know in real life mentions that they read my blog, but they never write comments. It kind of annoys me sometimes, actually. And here I did the same thing to you!! So sorry. Truth be told, I feel sort of guilty spending much time on blogging. I read quite a few, but don’t take the time to comment as much as I used to, sadly. Commenting is where the friendships really get built.

    June 28, 2008 at 7:02 pm

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